Much has been written (and more said!) about the joys of a good old Irish rasher sandwich. (Bacon sandwich, to you philistines from far off shores!).
There is a certain level of preparation to this art form.
Firstly, you must go to your kitchen and light your grill. (If your grill is electric you should not attempt to use a match to light it - you'll burn your fingers).
As your grill heats up, you should select at least THREE perfect rashers of bacon from your pack. If you bought your rashers from ANY major supermarket chain, you are already fighting a losing battle! Only buy rashers from tinkers or chancers - they're too stupid to try to con you into buying rashers cut from piggies loaded with water. You might just find a DECENT rasher from them.
Place your rashers CAREFULLY on your grill pan. Insert grill pan under grill. Cook until sizzling. Then turn over (the rashers, not the pan). And cook other side until sizzling.
In the meantime, cut two hunks of Kelly's small loaf (fresh). Butter liberally with REAL butter (none of that Low Low shite). According to taste or sexuality (Lesbians and Homos like sauce), apply your chosen sauce to the BREAD!
Evenly spread the rashers (still sizzling) onto the bread. Apply the upper part of the sandwich. Turn off the TV and the radio. Tell the wife / girlfriend / dog etc to go away.
Munch and enjoy...
Isn't that BETTER than sex?